So when we started the series, our first few drinks didn’t have a whole lot of rum in them. And all good Tiki fans know – Rum is the lifeblood of Tiki. It’s the beginning, middle and end of Tiki drinks. Rum, my friends, is where it is AT.

However, when we shoot episodes – well, we’d have a drink first. We’d generally drink the best stuff we had. Then when we were good and loosened up, we’d come up with an idea.

By then, we’d have drunk all the rum. So we did stuff like “The Hullabaloo”, which, I gotta be honest, isn’t all that Tiki.

So after episode three, a select few of the Tiki purists out there were… displeased. I wandered across one of the threads at tikiroom.com where one poster, a regular named “Trader Woody”, was sad we hadn’t come up with more rum drink as rum was his favorite. In fact, Trader Woody had recently submitted a cocktail of his own design (the Trader Woody) to Tikiroom’s online “create a drink” contest and had won second place.

So, to win back the hearts and minds of rum loving Tiki heads across the ‘net, we decided to use Woody’s recipe, and even gave him a big hearty “cheers” at the end. I’ve got a soft spot for this episode; Woody saw the episode, posted a glowingly thrilled response, and probably went about the rest of his day with a big smile on his face.

And you know what? Making people smile? Man, do we like to do that. We like it A LOT.

Trader Woody’s Drink

2 ounces Dark Rum
1 ounce Amaretto
1 ounce Pineapple Juice
1 ounce Orange Juice
couple splashes of Lime juice

Mix the ingredients over ice; load up a fresh glass with crushed ice. Pour the mixed goodness over the crushed ice. Enjoy the rummy goodness.

BOY the cupboards were bare when we came up with this one. I think it’s the simplest cocktail we’ve ever done – three ingredients!

Well, besides “Interlude”. That recipe called for a bottle of Screech and a healthy portion of laughing lettuce.

Hullaballoo

2 ounces Brandy
2 ounces Scotch
6 ounces fresh lemonade

Science!

Doctor Tiki gets full credit for this one. It’s a prescription pad original.

The Trap Door

1 ounce Gin
1 ounce Spiced Rum
Juice of 1/2 a lime
2 oz fresh orange juice
1 oz soda water

Madly combine ingredients. If there’s no more room for Soda, use to your own better discretion. Drink and disappear.

We did this one for our second episode and YES, I KNOW. This is NOT the classic recipe. It’s not even close. It was episode two. I mean, come on. Bourbon? See, we had Gin, Bourbon, a great looking mug, and a convenience store downstairs. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I swear, the ghost of Trader Vic appeared later that night when I was sleeping, and he tried to kill me with a bar spoon.
Aaaanyhow!

Here’s the Tiki Bar TV Version of this classic. Which is… you know, like our show. A little screwy.

The Suffering Bastard

1 1/2 ounces Gin
1/2 ounce Bourbon
3 ounces of Ginger Ale
the juice of 1/2 a lime

Pour ingredients into a shaker, toss in some ice, swirl around with the cap off and then decant the entire thing back into your mug (which is called “rolling”, by the way). Some university kid sent me an email cursing me and my “stupid drink” because he put the cap on his shaker, and shook the shit out of it – and the thing exploded all over the dame he was trying to impress. Whoops.
So, you know, DON’T shake carbonated drinks. That’s today’s hot tip. You can have that one for free.

Heya! We’re starting to move the archives over from Tiki Bar TV’s main site to here – so TikiJohnny will be serving as the main archive for all the cocktails featured on our episodes. Search by cocktail, ingredient, what have you.

Starting from the first episode, I’m going to quickly play catchup. So here we go!

We opened our Tiki series with a tequila based cocktail. ‘Cause we’re crazy like that. Yeah, thanks for all the “friendly fan mail”, Tiki afficinados. Please take a moment to notice the many Rum based cocktails that soon followed!

To be honest, the classic Marg is still one of my all-time favorite cocktails. It’s refreshing, energizing, and gets you good and loopy. Jimmy’s recipe is still my all time favorite – god’s honest truth, it’s taped to the inside of my kitchen cabinet on an index card, a subtile reminder that while I may have opened the door for a coffee mug, it’s never too early to mix me up a marg.

Oh, and if you haven’t watched episode one yet? Please don’t. Even now, when I watch that one, it’s like the podcasting equivalent of looking at my 8th grade yearbook photo.

Jimmy Buffett’s Classic Margarita

Fill shaker with Ice
Squeeze the juice of two fresh lime wedges into the shaker.
2 oz gold Tequila
1/2 oz white Tequila
1 1/4 oz lime cordial
1/2 oz Triple Sec
a splash of Cointreau

Shake, rim the outside of your glass with a lime peel, salt; squeeze in the juice of one final lime wedge, pour yourself some magic.

For the first time in a while, I’m staying home on a Saturday and enjoying a movie. What a refreshing change! Now, just because I’m not going out, it doesn’t mean I’m going to sit here like a miserable bump on a log drinking ginger tea or anything floofly. I mean, I’m not a god damned Priest, am I? So let’s get to drinkin’.

Now, I want somethng… muggable. Something I can take wee sips of while I watch my movie, something hot – so I can just lay back on the couch (well, technically, it’s a futon, but whatever) and relax.

How about a Hot Toddy? OOOooooh, that’ll work Nicely.

The Hot Toddy

2 ounces of whisky (some people like brandy, I prefer using whisky)
1 ounce of fresh lemon juice
2 barspoons (about a teaspoon) of simple syrup or honey
3 ounces of hot water
1 cinnamon stick
4 or 5 whole cloves
couple slices of lemon

Mush a couple cloves into each lemon slide (stick em’ in the rind) and toss those into your mug. Add in all the ingredients with the hot water coming in last and stir it up with the cinnamon stick. This is great for taking the edge off a sore throat, relaxing after an abusive workout at the gym (or so i’m told, anyhow) or just plan chillin’ out.

Now that I have my Hot Toddy, I’m good to go. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have an appointment with my DVD player and my friends Brock Sampson & Hank and Dean Venture.

Ok, it’s late Sunday night (technically Monday morning) and BOY am I feeling rough. I need something to take the edge off, you know, like a late night snack for my hangover. I’d deal myself up a Bloody Mary but we drank all the mixer last night, plus I feel like having something kind of sweet that I can sip at rather than some big monster. Hmm… How’s about this?

The Brandy Alexander

2 ounces of Brandy
1/2 ounce of creme de cacao (light or dark, whatever you have)
1/2 ounce of cream

Nutmeg sprinkled on top for garnish.

Shake these over ice and decant into a chilled martini glass. Wait, my martini glasses are still in the dishwasher. It’s clean, but certainly not chilled. No worries! To quickly chill it I’m going to put it in the sink, load it with ice, and fill it with water and let it sit for a minute or two; that’ll cool off while I’m shaking up this little yummy midnight libation here.

Aaah…. that’s MUCH better. Hair of the chocolate dog.

Cheers!

JJ.

Here’s a single-serving classic created by none other than the Trader himself – it’s a “mini” version of his famous Scorpion Bowl, which you can enjoy at home, alone, while polishing your Tiki Mug collection.

This one is taken from the Trader Vic’s Tiki Party book, which is an great collection of Tiki classics. It’s even got the original Mai-Tai recipe, so as far as I’m concerned, that’s worth the price of admission alone.

The Scorpion

2 ounces of silver (light) Rum
1 ounce Brandy
2 ounces of orange juice
1 1/2 ounces of lemon juice (one one ounce if you like it a little less tart)
1/2 ounce orgeat syrup (raise it to 3/4 an ounce if you want it a hint sweeter)
1 cup of crushed ice (plus extra cubes)

A gardenia for garnish if you like – but hell, it’s a single serving, so you’re probably drinking it alone anyhow, so who cares? And seriously, after three of these you won’t care if it’s got a flower on it or not.

Combine the rum, brandy, orange juice, lemon juice, orgeat syrup and crushed ice in a blender and pulse for a few seconds. Pour THAT over the ice cubes (in a double old-fashioned glass) and get ready to be stung.

Cheers!

***UPDATE!!*** I just prepared a load of these drink and I must say, I think Vic has got some o the measurements wrong. 1.5 ounces of fresh lemon is, like, SERIOUS pucker time. I lowered it to an ounce, and jacked up the Oregat to 3/4’s of an ounce, and it seems to work much better. Try it for yourself and tell me what you think!

JJ.

Wow, ok, the idea of a “cocktail every day” kind of falls by the wayside when things get busy! So, my apologies. Let me make it up to ya’ll with a bright and tasty summertime cocktail!

Here’s one that a friend of mine fell in love with on a recent visit to Bermuda; he didn’t did get the recipe from the bartender but did come back demanding I find out how it’s made. One of my trusty cocktail books, Caribbean Cocktails, describes it as this:

The Yellowbird

Fresh squeezed juice of one orange
Fresh squeezed juice of half a lemon
1 ounce Tia Maria
1 ounce Dark Rum
1/4 ounce of Passion Fruit Syrup

Shake over ice, decant into a Collins or rocks glass filled with fresh ice. Orance slice for garnish.

I’m a little wary of recipes that call for “the juice of X”; I prefer exact measurements. What if it’s a big orange? A small lemon? Meh. Gimmie specifics. You’d never hear Trader Vic say “throw in some lime juice”. Great drinks follow exacting specifications! Cocktails are like alchemy; you need the exact amound of X and Y to create Z. That being said, I tried this one with an “average” sized orange and lemon and it worked out pretty good… Anyone else have a alternate recipe? The Yellowbird may be an elusive fowl to pin down. Like the unicorn, I have the feeling it’s a fabled creature that takes many forms.

I will continue my hunt.